Naruto, Real Ninja
by Burrosis
Summary: What kind of ninja stands still and fires off jutsu after jutsu?  Not Naruto.  Read where Naruto learns to be a real ninja.  Strike when least expected, never be caught, never be suspected, never be known.
1. New direction in life

Chapter 1

Naruto was never a normal boy. He knew this and never let that fact get him down. Instead he chose to embrace his abnormality and use it to thrive in his chosen environment.

The Village hidden in the Leaves is a ninja village. Members of this village choose to follow a path not many are comfortable traveling. The ninjas of this village just like all other hidden villages are tasked to do the dirty jobs of others. While a few like what they do, others choose see it as simply following orders. Most non-ninja people knew this fact, but many choose to ignore it and live in blissful ignorance. Naruto is not one of these people.

Ever since Naruto was little he knew he wanted to be the best at something. He didn't care what, as long as he was the best. Quickly he chose his career out of necessity. The reason for this necessity? People HATED him.

At the age of five, he didn't know why, but he did know he needed to find a way around people's hate. The few stores that did not throw him out when he stepped in, charged him ridiculous prices for the worst quality items. Naruto knew this because he watched others. The sun kissed blonde watched almost everyone around him.

At first it was to watch out for attacks, so he knew when to run or hide. This habit evolved when he realized his goal. Instead of simply watching for attacks, he watched others habits and skills.

The first thing that Naruto saw, that would help him with his newfound dream was a ninja (he knew by the vest that all higher tiered ninja wore) and his daughter. The father was showing the girl one of the skills they learn at the ninja academy. The man transformed himself into a replica of his daughter. Both the girl's and Naruto's eyes lit up at this display.

Of course when Naruto saw this he was amazed. Something so useful was taught in just the academy? Sure others may not see it as useful as him because of his status in the village, but for someone like Naruto who was hated on sight, this strange new ability would be a godsend. He quickly resolved to learn this skill as soon as possible, as it would help him get necessities without risking a beating.

He made his way to the library where he knew there were instructions to do this transformation technique, but predictably he was turned away at the door with a scornful remark. Oh they let him in while he was with the Hokage too learn to read, but whenever he tried to get back in he was turned away, sometimes forcefully. The young blonde now knew he had two options. One would be easier than the other, but the second would require more finesse on his part. The first option would be to go see the old man Hokage and ask him to either teach him or get in into the library. The second option would be to find a way to sneak into the library and teach himself. Naruto thought over these options for a while, weighing both the pros and cons for either action. He realized that if he wanted to be the best, he would have to figure out how to do this himself, without outside help. He saw this as a test in stealth. All ninjas needed stealth so why not work on his?

Naruto waited for a large crowd to go into or out of the library to make his first attempt. Oddly enough this amateurish attempt worked and he was in. Now he had to work on not being seen by the head librarian while looking for what he wanted.

The ninja section of the library astounded him. There were so many different things to choose from. He refocused and set about his personal mission. While walking through all the aisles and looking at all the different areas of the ninja life, Naruto realized that while he still wanted to be the best at his chosen field, he couldn't ignore the others. So he modified his goal.

He would be the best at his chosen field, and be well above average for all of the others. He would have to talk to the old man and see which lifestyle of the leaf ninjas were lacking in skill so that he could help the village as best as he could. Yes the people hated him, but he quite liked his village. The few that got to know him made the others that hated him worth protecting.

As the young demon container made it to the aisles marked academy, he quickly started his search for a transformation technique. He found it fairly quickly as there were only so many things that academy students learn.

Skimming it once to get the feel of it he realized that he had no idea what this chakra was. Searching once again he found a scroll on chakra.

Reading carefully through the chakra scroll until he understood it and moves back to the transformation technique that he needs. Quickly copying the hand signs and molding his chakra like it said on the previous scroll and with a lot of smoke he had transformed into the man who had shown his daughter this technique earlier in the day.

Barely able to contain his excitement he works on his newfound skill deep in the library so nobody would see or hear him. After figuring out that the smaller amount of chakra he used made less smoke, he refocused on doing it without a sound and without smoke.

A couple of hours later he could get it done with faint wisps of smoke and realizes that he is hungry. With this revelation the blonde decides that he should take a break and show his new skill to the old man Hokage and maybe get some food out of it.

Ignoring the secretary that would have turned him away, Naruto kicks open the door of the Hokage's office. "Hey old man, want to see what I learned today?"

The Hokage just looks up amused at the young boy who shows no respect to anyone, least of all to him, the village leader. Sarutobi says, "Sure Naruto, what have you been up to recently?"

Naruto doesn't even respond and just goes thorough the hand signs that he has come very familiar with over the course of the day. What was once a five year old blonde, is now a mirror image of the Third Hokage. Naruto looks down and still sees the faint wisps of smoke and gets frustrated. "God, I just can't get rid of all of this smoke no matter what I do!" He looks up at the gaping real Hokage, "Old man can you help me out with this? I can't do it without smoke."

The question shakes Sarutobi from his stupor. As he is about to answer the fake Hokage's stomach rumbles loudly and Naruto changes back rubbing his stomach.

The, now, only Hokage says, "Why don't I tell you over some Ramen?" Much to the boy's pleasure.

On the way to Naruto's favorite ramen stand, Sarutobi sees once again all of the hate filled stares directed at the young boy walking alongside him, and instantly knows why said young boy wanted to learn the transformation technique so badly. It would be an escape from the village that treats him so badly. He is shaken from his musings when he is asked another question.

"Old man you should know what's going on with all the ninjas. Which ninja field is our village's weakest? I want to know so I know what I have to be the best at when I grow up."

Said old man smiles at this, but doesn't know wether to lie to the boy or not. Truthfully Kohona's weakness lies in out assassins and interrogation specialists, but should he tell a five year old boy that? While he is debating to himself Naruto sees the reluctance on the Hokage's face and decides to help the old man.

"You don't have to lie to me. I know ninjas kill people. I also know that plenty of ninjas kill people on almost all their missions and still lead an almost normal life here in the village with families and friends and everything."

Sarutobi smiles sadly at this. Such a hard truth should never be realized by someone so young. With his mind made up he decides to tell the truth. "Kohona is weakest in assassination, torture, and interrogation. It isn't like we have bad ninjas in those areas, it is just that we have so few, we can barely do the missions necessary that come in while having some stay in the village for information gathering."

Naruto simply nods, "Thanks old man I'll see what I can do for ya. But could you tell me the kinds of things I would need to know or do so I can figure it out on my own?"

In a low voice while they are both eating ramen at Ichiraku's Sarutobi explains the kinds of things that these kinds of ninjas do and what is expected of them skills wise.

When the meals and instructions are done, Naruto had taken notes on some napkins, the orphan and Hokage part ways once again.

Naruto looks up at the sky and sees that it is almost dark so the library should be closed. As he begins to walk home he looks at his list again. His eyes stop on on specific part. _Be able to sneak in anywhere_. Changing course Naruto heads towards the library building to see if there is any way for him to sneak in.

On the roof of the building next to the library, Naruto is scouting out his target. As it is a little after sundown and he had already seen the head librarian lock up and go home so he had the place to himself, if he could get in. He noticed that the rain gutter was fairly close to the windows, and he remembered that he was on the second floor that had all of the academy things. Quickly jumping up to the library roof he made over to where the pipe for the rain gutter was. Looking around to see if anyone would see him, he notices that there isn't anyone who could tell what he was doing. As fast as he can he slid down to he was even with a second floor window.

Miraculously it was unlocked and after a little difficulty getting his footing, the young blonde was inside on the second floor. He turned and checked the lock to find that there wasn't one. The demon container marveled at his luck and noted the entrance so that he could use from now on.

And so started the first of many nights spent in the library learning how to be the village's best ninja.


	2. Over the years and Graduation

Chapter 2

Naruto has come a long way from a scrawny little street rat civilian boy. Seven years have come and gone since he made his decision to be the best. The first thing that changed was his appearance. Gone were the white t-shirts and red shorts. Replacing them were blacks and very dark grays. He wore a long sleeve, tight charcoal shirt with a black overcoat that fell to his thighs. Covering his legs were ANBU style black pants and on his feet were black steel toed athletic shoes. (Don't have a better idea for shoes. Sandals? Seriously? Boots would make too much noise and are heavy. Deal with it.)

Those two years he spent before going into the academy were well spent in his opinion. The young boy repeatedly broke into both the civilian and ninja libraries to make sure that he at least had a solid base on the majority of topics before he was actively taught.

As it turns out, those late night visits put him well above the clan children in his class. He suspected that they either didn't care at the time, were too lazy to actively train that early in life, or their clansmen were honestly too busy to teach them. Instinct told him that it was one of the former.

Early on in his training he had asked the Old Man for something that acted as the equivalent of weights as he had read that using them too young would be harmful to his growth. The Hokage put a special type of seal on him that was called a Resistance Seal.

What the Resistance Seal did was make the body work harder just to move. It would be compared to walking underwater. Each level of the seal made it harder to move, while increasing the natural speed of the wearer. One of the perks is that it can be released with a half seal in case the wearer of the seal is in a tight spot. After all the years he has had it, he is on level five of the seal.

At the age of nine, just four years after establishing his goal and two years into the ninja academy, Naruto decided to see if he could break into Hokage Tower. There was nothing malicious in the idea, it was more of a test. If the results of the test would be looking at some of the most valuable things in the village, then who was he to complain.

Flashback

For an entire month, he had been watching patrol patterns in and around the Tower. He was finally ready.

It was time! He darted up the wall utilizing one of the very small blind spots of the patrol groups. He made his way quickly and silently to a small ventilation air duct. Much too small for an adult, hell even too small for someone in the mid teens. Plenty big for someone of his stature.

Navigating through the air ducts that were designed to prevent what he was doing was a fair challenge. Doing so silently was extremely taxing for the young container.

After what seemed like eternity, Naruto was out from the confined space. He dropped down as planned in front of the assistant's desk. He mentally sneered at the chair where the bitch of a woman worked, that caused him so many issues to just see the Old Man. However on the outside he kept his 'mission face' on. Just a cold expressionless face that gave away no weakness.

He had gotten the idea from Itachi Uchiha before he went psycho and killed his clan. Said action only really reinforced his desire to do so. If he could do something like that out of nowhere, and there wasn't an ounce of warning, then who is to say that it isn't effective.

Turning towards to grand door to the Hokage's office, Naruto got out his standard lock picking set and went to work on the door. His theory was that the door probably had some huge and complex seal on it which protected it from forced entry. A run of the mill lock picking set, emulates a key. The door is set to recognize a key. So why shouldn't his 'key' work? It was worth a shot. It was simple enough to overlook.

It took a good few minutes to get the multiple tumblers set correctly, but he was in the room. No ANBU killing first and asking questions later, no alarms, no Hokage, and no trace left behind him.

Originally his idea, should he make it this far, was to leave a note on the Old Man's desk and maybe take his Icha Icha. He set out to do just that after reseting the lock the door behind him. Of course he made it halfway to the desk when he was distracted by a huge scroll that had very clearly written kanji on it for 'Forbidden'. He let a small smile slip through his 'mission face'. This was just too good to be true.

Opening one of the scrolls he had with him, he took out his supplies for when he got an idea for something new. This something new could be jutsu, next break in site, tactics, pranks, the list goes on and on.

Now lifting the scroll up and opening it was surprisingly difficult. He noticed a trip wire linked to some sort of seal, so he cut the wire before it lost its' slack. Finally having free reign on something incredibly valuable he set to reading and copying down descriptions of things that looked cool.

Immediately he saw the Kage Bunshin jutsu. After reading through it, he got a very sinister smile. This was much more important than a simple mask to hide his emotions. This could cut down training exponentially. Kami was smiling down on him at this moment.

Copying down the jutsu, he almost felt like crying tears of joy. Obviously he contained himself. He was still on a mission after all.

Towards the end of the scroll he saw something familiar. He had already copied down a good eleven techniques so far.

Naruto saw The Seal. His seal. The one he had no clue how it got on his body. And now after all this hard work on a whim, he was staring at his answer. Reading the description, everything started falling into place with his life. The beatings, both attempted and carried out, he had gotten to be near impossible to catch. The refusal of service. The looks. The overpriced goods. The whisperings. The curses. Everything.

He was a demon container. And the village in its ignorance couldn't tell the difference between a two hundred foot nine tailed fox, and a human child. Then again, maybe they could and they just needed an outlet to their pain and loss.

It didn't matter. All this seal in front of him meant was that he would have monstrous chakra reserves and someone to talk to, once they met.

Blinking out of his stupor, he realized that he had sat there thinking for almost an hour, and he needed to leave fast.

Rolling up the scroll and replacing it was done quickly enough. Taking out a fresh sheet of paper for his note, he quickly wrote down a few choice sentences. He would have gone after the Old Man's Icha Icha, but he didn't put it past the pervert to put protection seals around it, so nobody would know he was a devout reader of his student's work.

Leaving the way he came, making sure to lock the door again once he was on the outside with his lock pick set.

Once he was at the exit of the vent he checked his watch and resigned himself to waiting. Twenty two and a half minutes crawled by until the next blind spot. Taking his chance, he had a minute and forty seconds to get away unnoticed.

The next morning the Hokage made his way to his office and sat down behind his desk glaring at the paperwork that had materialized itself on his desk since the previous night.

He looked down and saw a note addressed to 'Old Man'. Knowing who it had been, but curious as to how it got there, he picked it up and read. Finishing the note he put it down and chuckled. Then he started laughing. Clutching his sides he reread the note. The hidden ANBU were silently wondering if the Old Hokage had finally cracked under the paperwork.

The Hokage signaled to one of them to step forward and reveal himself. 'Tora' stepped forward and received his order. Relatively simple. Retrieve the Leader of ANBU and one Anko Mitarashi.

Both of the required people reported as ordered. One was just a shadowed face under a hood, the other was an energetic purple haired kunoichi. Both looked with a puzzled, though only one seen, at their Hokage who was still glancing at the note every now and then and chuckling.

Finally he spoke. "It seems that someone broke into my office last night." He paused to gauge their reactions. There was an almost imperceptible stiffening of the ANBU commander, while Anko looked on in amazement that someone could do so in such a heavily guarded building and room, also with a small bit of confusion as to why she was called.

Sarutobi continued, "The perpetrator was kind enough to leave this note on my desk for me to find this morning." Again he looked at the people he summoned. The Commander showed no reaction this time, while Anko was thinking what kind of balls this guy had to leave a taunt behind for a Kage of all people.

"I think it would be best if the two of you read the note yourselves." He handed them the note folded over, like how he got it, with the highly disrespectful form of address showing.

Both of the other occupants were extremely curious as to what was written and left behind.

Both had to repress a snort as they saw how it was addressed. The Commander opened it and held it so that both could read at the same time.

After Anko read through it, she was having a hard time keeping her composure. The Commander wasn't better off, but he was hiding it much better. He dropped the note back on the desk, and all could see it.

"_Hey Old Man! You should really step up security in this stuffy old office of yours. Geez I'm nine years old! Maybe you should get me one of those cool ANBU masks and have me stand in the corners of the room watching you work. NOT. God, that would be boring. Possibly worse than actually doing all that paperwork. Anyway I'm gonna head out now, try to make it harder next time._

_Oh yeah, thanks for the letting me sneak a peak at the nice fancy scroll you got there that says 'Forbidden'. I found some really cool stuff in there. I know I'll be using more than a few of those sometime down the road."_

Underneath the note is a drawing of a chibi Naruto giving a victory sign.

Seemingly as an afterthought the Hokage got up and checked the scroll. Seeing that the trap was indeed bypassed, he just sighed and looked back at the other occupants of the room. They were holding it in better than before, but were now thinking of how the kid did it.

Both looked up and said at the same time, "I want him". The Hokage knew that they meant completely different things.

End Flashback

The blonde haired boy met the Kyuubi a few days after as he had to meditate in order to find him. One of the problems was to calm his mind, while knowing that he is going to go and meet the most powerful being in recent knowledge. He forced himself to calm as he had told himself that he would at least meet and try to talk to the Kyuubi before he did anything else with the things he had taken from the Hokage Tower.

Opening his eyes when he felt a pull on his mind, he realized that he was in a very dimly lit hallway. (Ha expecting sewer, nope remember his life is a little better and he has a reasonable goal/not an idiot) He followed the pull, instinctually knowing that he was going in the right direction. About half a minute later he was faced with a rather large door. Shrugging he opened it and was met with an extreme killing intent.

Forcing his shaking body through the door and towards the source was the hardest thing he had ever done, and probably ever do. The sight that met him was a gigantic room, with an equally large cage taking up the majority of the space.

What was looking at him was something so incredibly beyond frightening that it was indescribable. Glowing blood red eyes with a slitted pupil along with a menacing looking set of teeth.

Naruto tried to not let his fear show but he knew he failed. Still he pressed on. "I would like to make a deal with you Kyuubi." The demon fox looked amused, but didn't say anything so Naruto continued. "I will let you have access to my senses so that you could see the outside world again, while I in return, get to use your chakra with as minimal drawbacks as possible along with you giving me pointers or tips if I am having a problem."

"**And why would I accept your offer?"**

Well, that settles it. I am crazy. "Well by now I am sure that you have memorized every single detail of both the seal and the surrounding area. I guess you might want a change of pace?" There was a long pause, and Naruto got the impression that the Kyuubi was waiting for him to crack under his presence.

"**I accept, under the grounds that you will not embarrass me as my vessel. Now be gone!"**

Naruto felt the pull on his mind again, but it was much more forceful, and he no longer had a choice in wether or not to follow it. Naruto opened his eyes again to find that he was back in his bedroom, and focused on mentally changing the seal, like the Forbidden Scroll said he would be able to. He sighed. Now that that was over with, he remembered the kind of potential that the first jutsu he found had. Smiling he got back to work.

Using the Kage Bunshin jutsu with his training and reading schedule increased his skills vastly. It was almost scary when he realized that he had nothing left to read in the civilian library, and the only reason the public shinobi library wasn't the same was that it was more difficult to get his clones using a henge in larger groups.

A thing he really wanted to be able to do is genjutsu. Someone with his kind of mind could work wonders with genjutsu techniques. The problem was that he couldn't actually use it. His control was too bad. Seeing it as a temporary goal, he threw clones into chakra control exercises.

After a couple of months and countless clones later, he was able to do some low level genjutsus. He was just happy that he had the potential to do it, all it took was a lot of work.

Just under a year after what the people who knew were calling 'the break in' Naruto had given himself another mission. He knew he was miles ahead of his classmates and he wanted some real experience. Training is all well and good, but nothing beats experience in the field.

His plan formed. A few days earlier he had snuck into the missions room and searched the C ranked missions for something he could do in a single night. It took a good twenty minutes of searching, but he found something quick and relatively close to the village.

There was a small bandit camp in on of the towns that is just far enough from Kohona where bandits would call 'safe'. The town had commissioned the village to take care of the problem. Simple. No missing nin, just bandits.

The sun had just set. It was time to put his plan to action. He super charged a clone to stay at his apartment overnight, just incase. He made his way to the closest gate in the direction of the town. The 'vigilant' chuunin guards were sound asleep. Perfect.

Sprinting silently in a way that only those with ninja training can accomplish, he made his way past the guards and through the gate. As fast as he could he made his way towards the town with the problem.

Upon reaching the town he made a large amount of clones and told them to search around the town and dispel once they found the bandits.

A half hour past and he had found their camp. It was on the opposite side of the town from Kohona. Naruto thought to himself, 'at least they're not complete idiots'.

Some of his clones didn't dispel and surrounded the camp taking stock of the situation. There were no prisoners, which he was thankful for, as they would be witnesses. There were a total of twenty bandits with what looked like the leader in the center of the camp. The guy was one of the only ones awake this late and seemed to be reading something. He appeared taller than the majority of the others and had heavily tanned skin to go with his bald and muscle bound image of 'leader'.

Naruto decides that the best course of action is to kill the lookout then use his Bunshin Daibakuha (Great Clone Explosion) with a Henge to take out the leader and cause general chaos. His Kage Bunshins were surrounding the camp so that none would be able to escape. After the explosion he would just Henge into the same bandit he sent after the leader. As soon as he killed one, he would change his Henge into that person and systematically take out the entire camp.

Naruto nodded to himself. Not the best plan, as he preferred to be silent and swift, but he needed to get this done and return.

His plan worked rather well so far. The original lookout, didn't even sense his presence. All it too was a quick kunai to the back of the neck, severing his spine from his skull, while keeping his head attached. Quickly memorizing his features he created a Bunshin Daibakuha and had the clone Henge into the lookout, while he himself did the same.

Naruto sent his clone off to the leader, while he followed behind at a subdued pace, not wanting to be anywhere near the explosion. The blonde saw that his clone approached the leader as if he was going to make a report. The leader didn't even fully look up from whatever he was so engrossed in.

After the explosion went off, needless to say that the entire camp was awake and had many things running through each of their heads. The most predominant one was 'What the Hell?'

Nobody noticed that their numbers were being systematically destroyed. Even the last one was so caught up in the confusion that he never suspected that the man he had come to befriend over sake and stories was anyone other than who he appeared.

Once the job was done, he used some low level fire jutsus to clean up and dispelled all of his clones.

Naruto had turned to leave when he realized just what he had done. The stench of burned flesh and blood was heavy in the air and seemed to cling to him. The blonde had always known that he was going to have to kill. He had accepted it a long time ago. He didn't want to be an idealist who was stabbed in the back by someone he thought had changed.

The knowledge that he was going to kill one day and the actual memory of the act that he had just done was suffocating.

Kyuubi, deciding to impart his wisdom on his vessel, said, **"Kit, it is the way of the world. There is no life if there is no death. The men you killed today were terrorizing a village. If you had not acted, while true the same thing would have happened, but each day they are left alive brings another day of suffering to whoever their victim may be."**

With that the demon fox left his vessel be. A few minutes later after going through Kyuubi's words a few times, he realized that they were true. Also to become the best assassin and interrogator he knew he would have to do worse to people who didn't deserve it like those bandits.

He would be the best. He would get through this. He would let it bother him, but it would never stop him.

Naruto made it back to the village about an hour before sunrise. A different set of chuunins were sleeping away their shift at the gate and the blonde demon container just walked by them. No effort given to be stealthy this time.

As he made it back to his apartment, he made his clone there dispel, and found that he had no visitors. Better safe than sorry.

The sun rose and while Naruto was eating his breakfast, he decided to go to the Old Man today and tell him what happened and ask him for more experience, than to force it like he did last night.

It was around eight o'clock and he was walking casually towards the Tower. Upon making it to the assistant, who tried to turn him away, he had decided to tell the Old Man exactly what he did and only leave out the moral support given by the Kyuubi. He had an image to uphold. After that thought he got the distinct impression that the fox was nodding.

Opening the door without knocking Naruto said, "Hey Old Man, how's that paperwork?" with a big smile.

With a depressed sigh, Sarutobi tried to smile, but grimaced instead. "It's going Naruto. Why are you here? Shouldn't you be at the academy? Are you finally going to let me allow you to join the graduating class?

"I came to tell you what I did last night." At the Hokage's nod, he continued, "I eliminated a batch of bandits." Naruto passed the C rank mission scroll that he had stolen two days ago.

Sarutobi's eyes narrowed, "And why did you feel the need to endanger yourself on a mission that I would only give to experienced gennin or chuunin?"

"I wanted to get some real experience, not just training. That mission seemed the easiest way of doing that."

Sarutobi sighed again, "And how are you dealing with it?" He didn't need to specify. The message was crystal clear to both parties.

"I got over it. There were no freezes, that came after, once the adrenaline died down."

Naruto proceeded to tell his Hokage the specifics of what happened the previous night, and when he finished he asked, "Old Man, is their and easier way for me to gain experience? It isn't like I want it to be easy, but I am confined to the village, at least until I graduate."

At the young boy's question, Sarutobi got a great mutually beneficial idea. "Now I may have an idea, but it would require you to be receptive to it." At Naruto's nod he continued, "I would like you to break into different buildings at different intervals to test village security. You have already proven satisfactory in this field and would like you to continue your skills in this area." The Hokage continued thinking, 'This is great, the Commander gets to see more of his skills, and Naruto gets more experience in espionage.'

Sarutobi could tell that Naruto just needed a little push to agree so he did. "I would also pay you. You would be doing a service to the village after all. The kind of buildings I have in mind would be exceedingly difficult." He paused to think for a moment. "Perhaps I could pay you for each attempt. How about A rank mission pay for a successful break in, with proof, and B rank mission pay for an unsuccessful attempt? Both without consequences."

The blonde, thinking about the kind of money he would be able to make, and with more money he would be able to buy better quality gear. The boy gave a smile and accepted.

"Now Naruto, since you are not a ninja currently, these will have to be unofficial missions. We will still pay you, but none of it goes on your record, until you join the ranks."

So for the rest of the time until graduation from the academy, Naruto would spent his time using his unique training method, and using the Kage Bunshin technique to its fullest. Scouting, stakeouts, reading, chakra control, elemental manipulation, studying, and much more.

By the time graduation came around three years later, Naruto had stacked up quite a hefty amount of mission payments under the table.

It was the meeting after they made this arrangement that Sarutobi gave the young boy a chakra card to check and see if he had developed an affinity yet. Also he wanted to congratulate the boy on breaking into his office yet again. He only wished that the walls weren't such a blinding orange.

After explaining the strengths and weaknesses of each element the old Hokage asked Naruto to channel some chakra into the plain card. What happens shocks them both.

The innocent little chakra card was violently torn to pieces and then soaked through leaving a fair amount of water pooled in the palm of his hand.

Naruto thought that it was cool, while Sarutobi was shocked speechless. He may have been unable to speak, but his mind was going in a thousand different directions.

'Such affinities are astounding. To be able to cause the same type of reaction from the card as sensei did for water, and for the wind chakra to tear it into that many pieces. Unbelievable.'

Gathering his wits, "Naruto, you have an astonishingly high affinities to both the wind and water elements. You show the same potential that the Second Hokage did in the water element. Also with an equal reaction to the wind element is just unbelievable. It could be possible for you to take elemental manipulation to the next level. I'll leave you to explore this, and I suggest you do so. This could be your greatest asset."

Shocked to the core by the Old Man's words, Naruto just nodded numbly and left. He made a few clones and used the Henge technique to change them into random jonin and sent them to the shinobi library to read up on elemental manipulation and how to train with it.

Hours later while doing his physical workout, he received the memories from his clones that he sent out. Grinning widely to himself at the possibilities of both the elements, he created hundreds of clones to start working on the exercises. He went back to his physical workout and realized that he may have to up the Resistance Seal up another level. He did so and felt hard pressed to move. To think that this was only level four.

Still taking his mind off of the difficulty of going through his exercises, he started brainstorming how to use pure elemental manipulation in his chosen profession.

His first thought was to make invisible blades of wind to take someone out without anyone becoming aware of his presence. Sticking with wind he decided that he could form thousands of little paper cuts on someone until they told him all they knew.

Changing gears to water. If it was true that he would be able to make water from the air, what was to stop him from making water form the air in someone's lungs. His targets would drown standing up.

Yes, elemental manipulation had possibilities.

The Academy. What a joke. Naruto sighed. He could have passed all of these tests when he was six and a half years old. A full six months before he was even enrolled into the ninja academy.

For the first month or so he made sure that he was the top of the class. Then he realized that the spoiled Uchiha in his class was insanely jealous. So instead of dealing with the drama of this pampered kid throughout all his days struggling not to pull a Nara and just sleep, he dropped down to below the Uchiha.

Thankfully the drop was not a steep one. He only had to drop to the number two ranking for his age group. He still made waves, but the Uchiha didn't have problems so others didn't vocalize theirs. Soon enough everyone forgot how far ahead he was in that first month.

The blonde took great pains to make sure that he was always ranked behind the Uchiha. The notable exception was Taijutsu. He would not allow himself to be beat up to save the pride of someone else.

So things fell into a rhythm. Naruto scored lower than Sasuke Uchiha but above everyone else. Naruto knew that he was irritating the unstable boy by being so close to the 'elite', but he couldn't bring himself to care.

An interesting benefit of being in the second rank of the class, gave him a much better team selection. A constant of the Academy was that the Rookie of the Year was paired with the Dobe and the highest ranked kunoichi. He had no desire to be paired with a book smart but useless fangirl and a hopeless Dobe.

Years past and the only thing that changed was that the girls developed fangirlism. It was horrifying to watch. (forgive the reference) It was like watching a car wreck. You know it isn't something you want to see, but you can't look away.

The girls didn't improve, in fact they got worse. Naruto was just glad that they were all focused on the Uchiha that they didn't mess with him. There was one notable exception, but the girl didn't interest him. He let it lay. The Hyuuga Heiress was diluting herself if she thought that she could have a relationship with him. Anything more than passing recognition would result in fierce punishment on her end and a call for execution on his.

Besides the obvious, she was just so boring. She couldn't string two words together without a stutter if her life depended on it. She fainted frequently. She didn't have it in her to harm someone. She wasn't going to cut it in the shinobi world. The only thing worse for her is that she doesn't even have the seal on her forehead to protect her from the worst, should she be captured.

Finally it was graduation day. He could finally leave this hell hole and never look back.

Iruka had just yelled at this childish class to settle down and they did. Both he and Mizuki started to hand out the final written tests. When Mizuki got to Naruto's desk, he paused, but didn't cast the genjutsu that he wished he could. He had learned years ago, that putting a simple genjutsu on his test was not enough to fool him. When all of his tests came back without a genjutsu and with all of the correct answers, he had just stopped casting them.

After the written test, which Naruto had purposely left the easiest question blank, Iruka led the class outside for the next two tests which were throwing accuracy and taijutsu.

Since Uzumaki came after Uchiha, it was a simple matter of matching his 'rival'. It was child's play. Once the Yamanaka heiress threw after Naruto, they all moved to the taijutsu sparring ring.

After the Uchiha's 'win' over the chuunin instructor, Naruto was called. He was forced to draw out the fight to the time limit to be ranked as number two, even though the chuunin instructor went much harder on him than the rest of the class.

Everyone was herded back inside for the final portion of the exam. Ninjutsu. Only the bare minimum for this Academy. It was sad how low standards had fallen. Even worse was the reason why they had fallen. To incorporate civilians into the shinobi program. The idea was so fundamentally wrong that if it were known that the true requirements of the 'great Kohona' to become a gennin this village would be the laughing stock of the entire Elemental Countries.

Anyone truly dedicated, could learn the entire curriculum within three months. The majority of that time would be teaching the youth to work with a team and memorization of major events of the village.

How could a shinobi village expect its' ninjas to survive when to become one, you didn't even need to know an offensive jutsu. Gennin were sent out into the world with only supplementary jutsu.

Naruto's name was called, breaking him from his musings. When he was asked to do the three jutsus required to pass, he had to force himself to do hand signs and to actually call out the jutsu name.

It was another thing he couldn't understand. Shinobi, messengers of death from the shadows, had to announce their presence with a jutsu name. Not only does a ninja, tell them their direction, but also what type of an attack it is, so that the enemy could have a chance to defend themselves.

Naruto firmly believed that one didn't truly master a jutsu until one could do it without hand signs and without words. He knew he would never use a jutsu in the field that he hadn't mastered to his standards.

Done with the 'exam' he took a headband with a black cloth, and left after hearing Iruka tell the people who passed to be back in two days for their team assignments.

The demon container wondered if he could bribe the man to put him on a good team. He thought to himself, 'Hmm, lets see. If there are women in his office I can get him to give me a good team by oh so subtly hinting at his perverted collection of Jiraya's books. If we are alone then I guess I could give him the secret to paperwork. Hmm decisions, decisions.'


	3. Meetings and Deals

AN: I don't remember if I said it before. It is stupid that I have to. I don't own Naruto. Also chapters will vary in size. Some could be as small as 1000 some as much to ten times that. I'm not too terribly consistent with things like that.

I very much appreciate reviews. I don't even care if you tell me my writing sucks, as long as you give a reason.

Chapter 3

Naruto opened the doors to the Hokage's office intent on bring the old man into placing him on a decent team. As planned, the room was full of jonin trying to decide who they wanted on their team.

All of them focused on the kid who just interrupted their meeting to select their teams. Feeling fairly awkward in the situation, he decided to force everyone to lighten up.

"Hey Old Man, could I interest you in a little creative bargaining?"

The assembled jonin were staring open mouthed at the boy's blatant lack of respect for their village leader. As one everyone looked to the Hokage for his reaction and found an amused but guarded expression on his face. Sarutobi quickly took stock of the room again. He was sitting behind his desk with various jonin positioned all around him. More than a few were kunoichi and within striking distance, so he hoped the boy wouldn't bring his Icha Icha into the discussion.

"Isn't that another way of saying you are going to extort something out of me?" The Hokage asked in a deadpan voice. Instantly Naruto's face was innocent as a newborn's.

With that faux expression on his face, all ANBU ninja, both current and retired, noticeably flinched and was on high alert. They knew just what this kid was capable of. It would have been humiliating if anyone outside of ANBU knew of what this young blonde had done to them. In their own headquarters no less.

The prank that hit home for all of the masked ninja was the third raid on their headquarters. The demon container had swapped out every single locker, mixing everything, on top of painting their official ANBU cloaks bright pink and purple for males and females respectively. Women's panties were in the guys' pockets. Guys' crusty 'should have been washed two weeks ago' boxers mixed in with the women's blouses. The worst though was the note he left behind.

Painted in a yellow that matched his hair on the wall across the entrance to the building was his taunt. _"To think, I am getting paid for this. It won't stop until you can catch me."_ Underneath the note was a chibi drawing of himself flashing the victory sign.

All ANBU related pranks after that had no note, and more importantly no further proof as to just who did it, even if it was obvious. Their only 'proof' was a painted on chibi drawing that would never leave the lips of any ANBU.

It had been a humbling few years for Kohona's elite ninja. They hadn't caught him yet.

Naruto keeping his innocent expression replied to Sarutobi's jab saying, "Extortion is such a strong word. I prefer to think that we came to a mutually beneficial agreement with both of us walking away satisfied." For the jonin who didn't know Naruto, they almost believed that he was that naive and pure. Then they remembered the stories of said boy, and stomped those feelings out ruthlessly.

While the aged Hokage was mulling over this 'agreement' that Naruto was going to propose, the assembled jonin couldn't believe that their Hokage was even entertaining the idea of putting up with this kid.

The jonin continued gaping like fish while Sarutobi was weighing the pros and cons of discussing this matter in front of so many witnesses. 'Knowing Naruto, he may just out me as a pervert, and I couldn't let that happen, especially now with so many kunoichi in the immediate area. On the other hand, Naruto may actually have something good.' were the thoughts of the Hokage.

Deciding to take the risk and hope for the best, instead of dreading the beating, he nodded for the blonde to state the terms of this 'arrangement'.

"Well in exchange for putting me on a team that would fit MY terms of acceptable, I would impart the age old knowledge that every Kage would sell their left nut for. Yes, I am taking of a way to rid you of your paperwork problem, which seems to be growing before my very eyes." He pauses. "How does it do that?"

Sarutobi just gives a shrug, then Naruto spoke again, seemingly remembering something. "Oh, and I would receive one 'Sarutobi owes me coupon'. I hope that isn't too much for you."

Naruto could see it in the old man's eyes. He had him beat. He knew it. He knew that he knew he knew it. The only thing that was stopping Sarutobi from jumping over his desk and bowing at his feet was the room full of gossiping jonin.

Similar thoughts were going thorough the monkey summoner's mind. He was trying to keep his composure, but it was a trying battle. He really wanted to act like he was about to get all of the kunoichi under his command to give him lap dances so he could die a happy man.

Trying to save face, Sarutobi replied in a strained voice, "I believe I will accept your deal please stay until after the meeting so we can complete it. I can promise you that this paperwork killer jutsu will get much use from me."

All jonin were floored. How the hell did this kid just get what he wanted? Paperwork cannot be that bad. Can it? Many of their thoughts went introspective. Some were straining to remember their Hokage not busy with a stack of papers. Some of the smarter ones were thinking of ways to get Naruto on their team, even if he wasn't as good as the Uchiha.

Sarutobi spoke again to the blonde boy, "This meeting was set up so that jonin could choose their teams from your graduating class. We have been going over the academy records of all of your classmates. Since they are in fact your classmates, and you have spent a considerable amount of time with them over the years, I am sure that the jonin here and myself would like to hear what you think of them. Also since you will be picking your own team, you should at least have some say on that."

The blonde demon container put on his innocent face, getting another flinch from the hidden masked ninja, and said, "I had no idea that you were choosing teams at this point in time." Naruto smiled a sickly sweet smile.

The Hokage just sighed as the boy went to find the nearest available chair. It seemed that the majority preferred to stand.

Once everyone was settled again Sarutobi asked, "Naruto, what is your opinion on your classmates, you see them everyday, and I know the jonin here would like to hear a different perspective than the teachers."

With a serious face the boy countered, "Do you want me to say that they all shit sunshine and daisies, or do you want the cold truth? The former is what is in those reports you have there."

Everyone looked around and nobody missed his implication. The assembled ninja all nodded to each other and looked to the young blonde for real information.

Deciding to start it off big, Naruto dropped his biggest bomb first. "Sasuke is not the true Rookie of the Year. In fact, I can name three people who could beat him in a fight regularly."

The reaction to this statement was so predictable it was almost sad. Some called bullshit, others just scoffed and looked away, while a small few looked interested. The Hokage asked the needed question. "Who?"

In answer, Naruto said, "Shino Aburame, Shikamaru Nara, and Naruto Uzumaki." This statement didn't get the same loud reaction as before, but brought forth many whispered conversations. Again Sarutobi took it upon himself to question the blonde. "Explain."

"Shino holds a lot back and will not show his true strength unless absolutely necessary and the," he scoffs, "tests at the academy are a joke that even civilians could pass with a little effort. This holds true if you look at some of the girls who passed.

"Shikamaru is simply too lazy to show his true strength. He is brilliant and nobody can match any strategy he thinks up. Again he won't show his true skills and potential because that would mean more work when he gets promoted quickly.

"And finally me. Before I stepped into the academy, I could have passed the final. I stayed because the 'demon brat' can't be seen getting too powerful too quickly now can he."

Naruto nodded to himself. He didn't give away any abilities of the three while still presenting a strong case.

Most of the room was shocked speechless by the information and few caught what Naruto actually did. One jonin spoke up, "What do you think of the last Uchiha then?"

Naruto looked for the man and found that he could only see one of his eyes. He didn't seem to be paying much attention to what was going on around him. The boy took a deep breath looking at the man who asked and said, "While he does have potential, he will never be a good ninja."

This was too much for some of the assembled. There were loud protests, to which Sarutobi held a hand up and called for silence. Once he had it, they all looked back to Naruto who was waiting for their attention.

Continuing like he was never interrupted, "The boy needs to have his head examined. He has a major superiority complex, which was prevalent even before the massacre. After the first month of being in the top ranked spot of the class, I gave it up to not have to deal with his attitude towards me. As soon as he sees something that is more powerful than he views this village has to offer, he will be gone."

Everyone looked nervous at this declaration.

"If this village truly wants to keep the Sharringan, then what it needs to do is slap a seal on Sasuke, and have him impregnate women that come forward." Seeing that some of the women were going to argue, he pressed on. "This is the world we live in, and this is the only way the Sharringan will stay in Kohona for the next generations. Notice that I said women that come forward. Not women that the little asshole chooses, so don't get your panties in a bunch."

The guys raised their eyebrows at this and some of the women were looking mollified. One woman had a shit eating grin on her face from listening to this kid so far.

"Moving on from the Uchiha. The majority of the clan kids have a chance to survive, while only two girls are salvageable from being useless whores who will be taken and sold into slavery on their first mission outside these walls." Everyone was surprised at the blonde. They had counted at least three girls that could become valued kunoichi of the leaf.

Naruto knew they were not going to like what he had to say next, but hey, he wasn't out to make friends. "Those two girls are Sakura Haruno and Ino Yamanaka. Both at this point in time are useless. Sakura more so without clan techniques. It will be up to whichever sorry bastard here that draws a short straw and gets them on their team to break them and build them up to be real kunoichi. Instead of the worthless sacks of shit they are now." Naruto pauses to get something to drink.

One woman, wearing, are those bandages?, that had red eyes seemed a little angry at this. "What about Hinata Hyuuga? Surely someone from the Hyuuga clan deserves to be put on a team."

The blonde boy chuckles at this, almost choking himself on his water. Red Eye didn't seem to like his reaction. "She is the only one of my class who I can say fro certain that the ninja world is not for. Hinata is a sweet girl, and I can see why you like her, but the ninja world is not sweet. I don't think I need to tell any of you that. That girl's nature is too kind. Even with her own father beating on her, she won't change. The best she can hope for is to work at a hospital full time and never go into the field, if she chooses that path."

The red eyed woman didn't seem to be taking his analysis of his classmate well. Before she could say anything he asked her some questions looking right at her so she knew just who he was talking to. "When you were in the academy, did no not do any supplementary training beyond what the teachers forced you to? By your build, I would say you specialized in Genjutsu. Did you practice your jutsus for hours on end? Did you follow your crush around all day every day? Did you even have a crush? Or was it a waste of time, keeping you from your goal of being respected despite being a woman?" She couldn't answer the questions. She knew that he knew the answers anyway. For both her and Hinata.

With no more questions coming from the jonin, Naruto turns to the old man, who had a contemplative look on his face. "Old Man, could you tell me the secret behind Kage Bunshin?" The Hokage seemed shocked for a moment at the randomness of the question. As soon as he thought about it, it clicked. With a huge smile, the Kage said a quick thank you and turned the floor back to the boy. Not without slipping a piece of paper into Naruto's hand.

With a smile that caused some to flinch, Naruto asked the group. "Now which one of you would like to be my sensei?"

One woman matched his smile and he noticed she was standing near Red Eye. He also noticed her distinctive attire, sending all different kinds of thoughts going through his head. But with his sneaking into the kunoichi only classes with a Kage Bunshin and henge along with his own personal training in the seduction arts kept him from even a little blush. Despite the clarity of his thoughts and the mental images that came with them.

She spoke up, "Oh gaki, we are going to have so much fun together."

With this some backed away, others averted their eyes, Sarutobi and the ANBU openly blanched at the thought of what the two of them together were capable of.

A world weary sigh came from the oldest man in the room. "If there are no objections to Naruto having Anko as his sensei then I guess that concludes his business in this meeting. I know Anko wouldn't dream of taking a full team. That being said, Anko and her new apprentice are dismissed." He knew that nobody would dare get between Anko and something she wanted. It ended in a rather lengthy stay in Kohona's hospital.

At the word apprentice, Naruto knew that this was both the best and worst think he could have asked for before storming into this meeting.

With a smile that promised both pain and pleasure, Anko walked up to the blonde boy, put her arm around him and said, "Gaki, this is going to be great." They walked out of the office leaving a room full of people wondering just how big of a mistake they just made.


End file.
